An awesome place I've visited:

Roatan

I have a weakness for guys/girls who:

Questing for the perfect woman is folly. A check list gets a man nowhere. Like buying a house, you’ll never find all you desire. But since you're interested, here it is. She'll require the knack of delivering the brushoff to unwanted, intrusive men. Some women have instinctive pest-control abilities, some don't. She’ll offer to pay her way; who actually pays is irrelevant, but willingness is critical. Her love of music reveals passion for life, while her dance moves will confirm this.

For me, a first date no-no is:

If I got to know you, I would invite you over for a romantic dinner and as soon as you arrived, I would pull you close and whisper in your ear "I have a swanson tv dinner in the freezer with your name on it" and then I would proceed to fill a wine glass with welch's grape juice"

What I would bring to show and tell:

Boats, Beaches, Bars, Beers, Beards, Bears, Blitzkriegs, Ballads, Barfights, and Pirates.

I want to come home to:

I'm going to see if anybody actually reads this stuff: I enjoy giving people wedgies, pulling the fire alarms in malls and collecting cover charges at bars where there is no cover charge. I guess I'll find out if anybody reads this stuff.