“Do you always wear those glasses? Because you have really beautiful eyes.”
“I felt like I was so nervous that I couldn’t talk, and was out of conversation topics. So I brought up ‘Shower Belly’.”
Here’s what you won’t find: candlelight, flowers, white tablecloths, a pianist or a wine menu that’s longer than half-a-page.
There are five dating instances that stick out in my mind as red flag moments in the most literal sense — where I visualized red flags sticking out my date’s ears. HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE YOU TO GET OUT OF THIS ONE? They had printed on them.
“If I don’t call a girl, it is most likely because I don’t want to touch her butt.”