The Necessity of the Post-Drunken Hookup Summitby Chiara Atik on June 07, 2012
You went to a “networking mixer” after work, where you pounded back three rather full glasses of Cabernet, then you met up with your roommate for “a drink” (a gin and tonic, an IPA, and a shot from the bartender, who’s your buddy). At around 11 o’clock, you see your co-worker at the other end of the bar, so you go over, say hi, buy another round, play a game of pool, empty your pocket change into the jukebox, send a series of incomprehensible text messages to every number in your phone, and then, suddenly, you and your coworker are making out. Like, very publicly. All over the bar.
The rest of the night gets a bit hazy from there.
The next morning, you wake up with a hangover and a sinking feeling in your stomach, as you start to remember the shot, the game of pool, the jukebox, the taste of your co-worker’s tongue in your mouth. Shit.
You don’t have feelings for your co-worker. And you’re pretty sure the drunken ambivalence is mutual. But when you see them at work, you can’t just pretend like their hand wasn’t on your ass 12 hours ago.
So a “We’re Okay” Summit* is required. This is where you contact the object of your tequila-fueled hook-up and suggest that you meet for an after-work cup of coffee. On the agenda are three things:
- Acknowledge that the hook-up happened.
- Ascertain that “you’re cool,” and that there are no awkward/hard feelings.
- Tacitly agree to never mention the hook-up again. EVER.
A post-hookup meeting is just good manners: you can’t pretend it didn’t happen (and to do so might upset the other person). On the other hand, you don’t want to turn it in to some long, drawn-out thing. Just a cup of coffee, a quick confirmation that “We’re okay,” and a bit of casual, non-hook-up related small talk to seal the deal.
Had any We’re Okay Summits in your past?
*Termed coined by my brilliant friend Alice.