I’ll never forget* the story of how the parents of my middle school friend, Danielle, met. They had gone to the same preschool in China for about a year before their families separately emigrated to the US, a few years apart. One family ended up in San Francisco and another in Southern California. Both families ended up opening restaurants called “House of Wong,” and both parents eventually became accountants, at which point they met, and only much later realized their shared history. When the two married, Danielle’s mom didn’t have to change her name: her last name was already Wong. Clearly, these two were meant to be together.

So many Modern Love essays have similar stories, like traveling to the other side of the world and meeting someone from your hometown, or meeting your boyfriend in the exact same way your parents met. It makes sense for someone who regularly reads the column (or who has heard a story like that of the Wongs) to look for signs that their own relationship was “meant to be.”

But can signs be misleading? Can they misdirect us towards the completely wrong person, just because it has the makings of a romantic comedy meet-cute? This week’s Modern Love concludes that signs do not a good relationship make.

Most of the time.

Except for the Wongs.

*It’s been about 13 years since I last heard this story, but, this is what I remember.

[Looking for Signs it's Meant to Be]