“Over the last month I’ve fallen in love with one of my best guy friends. Usually I would tell him, but the problem is he has a girlfriend. Trust me when I say I am trying not to be some home-wrecker, but it’s becoming more and more difficult to hide my real feelings. Do I tell the guy I love how I feel or continue to love from afar?
Feelings! What I wouldn’t give to bury the whole sodded bunch of ‘em and call it a day. Alas, then we’d be robots, and that would make for terrible advice columns. Example:
“Dear Anna, Does he love me?”
No, he’s programmatically incapable.
The main takeaway from your question is: “I am trying not to be some home-wrecker.” If you don’t want to be a home-wrecker, then don’t be one. Et voila! Thanks for playing the game of love. Your commemorative spoon and subscription to “Casseroles!” magazine will be in the mail shortly.
But, seriously, admitting you’re in love with a dude who is in a relationship is a pretty big risk with a slim possibility for reward, and in virtually every outcome, you lose. A few scenarios: