We were implying you guys would be naked. Because you’d be doin’ it. Did no one get that?
Order a Ny-Quil on the rocks and call attention to your wittiness with a coy, seductive giggle.
Some people go to weddings to celebrate the blessed union of two close friends. Those people are morons.
“What’s your favorite late night snack? Pie? I’ll buy 6 of them. That way you’ll have something to munch on after our fierce yet tender bang sesh.”
#4 Stage a fake phone call to your fake boyfriend, whose fake name is Bone Thug Murderer.
“Can you get that waiter back over here? I could totally hit a second round of that gold-dusted lobster. You’re paying, right?”