Red carpet glamour! Designer dresses! Meeting Brangelina poolside at the Chateau Marmont! There seem to be many perks to dating a filmmaker. But, let’s be honest, your next filmmaker-fling is probably more likely to be with an up-and-coming Indie director than with Martin Scorsese (and that’s probably a good thing).

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There are, though, certain things I’ve found to be true about dating a filmmaker of any stature. Here are 8 things they don’t teach you in film school about dating a filmmaker:

1. The filmmaker will always write your awkward sibling into a script. Or anything embarrassing from your childhood. In fact, your whole life is fair game for stories.

2. They are probably considering what angle they would shoot this serious conversation you’re trying to have with them from.

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3. The filmmaker will ruin every movie you watch together. For example, as you’re sobbing at the protagonist’s cancer revelation, they will comment on the use of a wide angle lens on a dolly.

4. During a shoot, a filmmaker always falls in love with his or her leading lady or man. It just happens. They’ve created a whole story about this person and they are constantly staring at them on set. They will fall in love during the shoot, but it will be innocent and it will be over when the film is over.

5. There is a lot of travel in any filmmaker’s agenda. Travel for shooting, travel for festivals, travel for casting, etc.

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6. They are considering who in your network they could tap for free labor on their next shoot. 

7. You may spend more than one Saturday as an extra. Or, if they’re super low-budget, you may find yourself staring in an Indie Horror taking place in your kitchen.

8. They have no predictable working hours, and may show up at your door at 5am after a night of editing. Enjoy your booty call — you’re dating a filmmaker!

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