Is Oral Sex “Sex”? Of Course! Also, Not Really.by HowAboutWe on January 11, 2011
Sent at 2:27 PM on Tuesday
me: do you think oral sex counts as sex?
Laura: yes. ish
The writers at Crushable have decided to take a strong stance on the whole “Does oral stance count as sex” debate. They say yes, it does, unequivocally. We say…well, it depends.
Oral sex is undeniably a sexual act (that’s why it’s called oral sex, not oral parlor games.) But there are too many distinctions between oral sex and intercourse to just lump the two together.
On a physical level, oral sex doesn’t have the same physiological impact as intercourse. Yes, you can still get STDs, but you don’t get pregnant. And while of course not every act of intercourse is an act of procreation, there is still a bit of a distinction between intercourse and a sexual act that’s purely for pleasure.
And speaking of pleasure, that’s another important distinction between oral sex and intercourse: During oral sex, usually one person is giving, and another person is receiving. (For the purpose of this argument, please spare me the “but I LOVE giving” line of thought for a second.) The fact that, in most cases, the pleasure isn’t mutual, or at least simultaneous, puts intercourse on a separate level. If a girl gives a guy a blowjob, they both participated in a sexual act, but did the girl have sex?
It is worth noting that, for many, oral sex is more intimate, something that follows sex in a progression of sexual intimacy, and not an “it doesn’t count” precursor to it.
So if you have oral sex with someone, but not intercourse, does that up your “number”? If you define number as “people with whom you’ve had sexual relations,” Clinton-style, then yes. If it’s “people you’ve slept with,” then, no.
Do you guys think oral sex is sex? Or not?