All I Want For Christmas Is To Hook Up With My High School Crushby HowAboutWe on December 16, 2010
Ah, going home for Christmas. The stress. The shuttling around, making obligatory visits to family friends. The sleeping in the same twin bed you grew up in. The fighting. What’s the one bit of silver lining in all of this? The possibility of getting wasted and hooking up with your high school crush.
Crushable wrote a piece today on how “Hometown Hookups Are The Best,” and we seriously could not agree any more. Had a shitty year of dating? Maybe you went out with jerks, or maybe you didn’t go out much at all. Hooking up with someone you had a crush on in high school is like, the single most life-affirming, confidence inducing move you can make. Obviously, that is hyperbole. But the only time in my life I have burst into a spontaneous fist pump was when I FINALLY hooked up with the guy I had a crush on at 14.
The pros: A tolerable visit home. Sex. Retribution for the unrequited years of your adolescence.
The cons? Small town gossip? Awkwardness next Christmas? Who cares!
You’ve been good this year; you deserve it.