What Your Boyfriend Was Thinking When He Picked Out Your Christmas Giftby HowAboutWe on December 20, 2011
A Mixtape: He loves music more than almost anything, and thinks highly of his taste. For him, a carefully crafted mixtape takes as much skill and talent and a painting would — you can bet he deliberated over every single song. While making this, he probably imagined where you’d be when you listened to it, and fine-tuned the list accordingly. He hopes that you will immediately recognize and appreciate how much thought and love went into this playlist, because he’s kind of broke right now.
Jewelry: Women love jewelry, right? And guys are supposed to get their girlfriends jewelry? So he went to a few jewelry stores and looked around and a very nice saleslady helped him pick out the perfect thing. (This is the perfect thing, right? You like it? You’d wear it? Promise you like it?)
A Book: Your boyfriend is a thoughtful, considerate guy. He is interested in your mind. He appreciates your intellect. He hopes you will like this book (note the inscription on the inside jacket — he labored for hours over this inscription!) and appreciate the fact that he went for such a classic, sophisticated gift over something showy. You two are so above that.
A Plane Ticket: This is exactly the type of over-the-top, romantic gesture your boyfriend has been dreaming of making since he was a little kid, and now that he’s finally in a position to act on it, you are the lucky lady who gets to come along for the ride. So enjoy Aruba/Paris/Vegas, and remember: it’s not just love, he’s offering you, but a lifestyle.
Lessons, For You: Haven’t you been saying that you wanted to learn how to quilt/cook/speak Spanish? See, he listens!
A Sex Toy: Let’s be real here: you’re a great, smart, interesting woman, of course you are. But you’ve got years to go before you start giving each other cookbooks and sweaters for Christmas. He thinks you’re sexy as hell and wants to get you a present you’ll both enjoy.
A Gift Certificate: He loves you. He swears he loves you. But he has no idea in hell what to get you. Please don’t hold this against him! Buying presents makes him break out into a sweat. Next year, make it easy for him and tell him exactly what you want. Please.
A Mug Full of Chocolate: He probably realized on his way to meet you that he forgot to get you something for Christmas, and instead of being honest about it, stopped and picked something up on the way. Be careful with this one.
A Homemade “Coupon Book”: He saw it on TV, thought it was pretty cute, and made you a personalized (and sometimes racy) version. And if you never cash any of them in, well, that would not be the end of the world.
A Bath Salt Gift Set: There was a 2-for-1 sale, and he bought you and his mother the exact same gift.