19 Awful Things To Say After Sexby Emily Winter on July 18, 2012
1. We’re almost done, just rub my bald spot.
2. I can tell you’re in a hurry, so I’ll get out of your hair.
3. DO YOU LOVE ME NOW?!
4. I need bleach, rubber gloves, and tequila immediately.
6. And to think, seven hours ago I was barfing in this bed.
7. Your sex parts are kind of a mess.
8. I can’t stop thinking about shrimp.
10. I think you owe me an apology.
11. You have some sex boogers to clean up.
12. Race you to the toilet.
13. *just start singing Celine Dion*
15. They have better beds than this in prison.
16. I’m 17.
17. Everything itches.
18. Gimme a fist bump if you feel BLOATED!
19. Runtime error.